‘I will take you to a more beautiful place.’ I sensed God’s invitation to come away as I looked out the windows to the mountains around me. The thought of taking a sabbatical felt unreal. My husband and I, along with our three children, had served for 20 years on a mission field. It had been a full experience – full of excitement, lots of challenges, but plenty of joys as well. Though this mission field was in my own country, it was a remote village with a different culture. The isolated living and cross-cultural experiences took a toll, and we had come to a place trying to understand the meaning of burnout, soul care, and rest. We sought a counsellor’s help. Her diagnosis of both my husband and I was that we were severely burnt out and that we had been that way for some time.
She advised, “If you don’t take a break now, at least for a year, you will end up hurting yourselves.”
Her words were the push we needed to decide to go on a year-long sabbatical. This was in 2021. By divine interconnections, we found ourselves in a beautiful town near the Himalayas. And we began our season of rest. God met me in special ways during the sabbatical. The pines seemed to warmly embrace me and give a healing I couldn’t have known. The fragrance of the earth and the forest soothed me. The beautiful mornings, restful days, and fun-filled moments restored us as a family. We found a local community of Christ followers to worship with. This was incredible.
In God’s deep love for us, he led us to do the Ignatian Spiritual Exercises during our sabbatical. The exercises immersed us in the Gospels – the life of Jesus, his death and resurrection. Through the exercises, the Lord invited us to hand over the work we had been doing and wait on him for the next season of our lives. The stepping away was both painful and sweet. The waiting that came after was hard and long. I wanted clarity. I guessed what we could do next. My Spiritual director asked, ‘Why do you want to know? Can you stay in the unknown?’ The Triune God was inviting me to wait where I was rushing to know. It wasn’t time yet. The Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit were caring for our weary souls and tired bodies and we had to surrender our beings to him. He gave new birth when it was time.
Two years before the sabbatical, in 2019, my husband and I joined the Spiritual Formation Course at the Renovaré Institute, which ended a year after the sabbatical due to Covid. Here I learnt that I was more important to God than the work I was doing. I embraced God’s goodness. I was immersed in a loving community of Jesus lovers from my cohort. I was learning a new way of living. That the Triune God loves ME deeply, became a reality and I wanted to live in that reality. This understanding was instrumental in giving both my husband and me the freedom to step out for the sabbatical and later hand over the school we had nurtured. Trevor Hudson, a dear friend and speaker at the institute, spoke on the Cycle of Grace[1], inviting us to work from a place of being God’s beloved. God loved me and wanted me to be well, more than serve well. Service was not the priority for God. I was. My family was.
Being beloved,
Most deeply loved,
Is a grace-gift for us image-bearers.
To live from the core of our belovedness is God’s invitation to us all.
Each one of us is living our unique story.
I wonder what longings stir in your heart as you read my story?
I wonder if there are desires that God is awakening within you?
I wonder what invitations the sweet Spirit is placing before you?
These are precious. The Triune God continues to pursue us and draw us deeper into himself through these desires and longings. We are always being invited to live in his grace. I wonder what grace-invitations you are receiving today?
Originally published in Companioning Center
[1] Hudson, Trevor. (2012). The Cycle of Grace: Living in Sacred Balance. Upper Room Books.
Photo by Tanaya Sadhukhan: https://www.pexels.com/photo/hands-holding-head-of-newborn-3764623/
Being Beloved
By Lydia Royce
